I want to love Christmas

I want to love Christmas, I love what it stands for, that God loved us so much that He sent Jesus knowing that He was sending Him to ultimately die for us. But the actual holiday really wears me out. This year, all I can think of is that there is not enough money for gifts for my family, much less my friends, who I know have already purchased things for me. I know it shouldn't be about the gifts, but for kids, it is. It is no fun to try to explain why Santa Claus likes the neighbor kids and the kids at school and church better than you, since they got...(insert cool Christmas gift here) and you didn't. It also means another year of being reminded who in my family doesn't speak to whom, and trying to be the peacemaker and going to "have Christmas" with all the warring factions of the family so that none of them has to appear at the same place and time. (like they would!) Their fight becomes my pain. still, Merry Christmas...